Don’t Waste my Precious Time with Hogwash and Gibberish

Fallon Agency Slideshare Link

The above link was shared on Twitter from a to be left un-named source.

Its hogwash. I would fire the person who created this presentation. I will admit I do not know the person. It could be Fallon and this is what they teach their employees. 98 Fucking slides with maybe 7 or 10 of value. WTF? Don’t waste my time. I want no gibberish. I want none of the Advertising-Marketing lingo. I want real info that gets right to the point. Is that so hard?

This is what the 98 slides say:

1] Identify the Goal/Problem
2] Here are the various digital technologies available to use.
3] Fallon can help you choose which of these technologies and strategies fit your needs.
4] Lets go do it.

The slides infer that we all want to interact with brands all the time. That is the biggest piece of bullshit ever stated. In fact we don’t…except when we have a need. We will interact if we buy something and it sucks. Or we want something they don’t have or maybe we substitute and wish we didn’t have too. Yes if we are already passionate Brand Ambassadors on our own we will do this online. But remember people become that not from Advertising but from great Product-Brand experiences.

Other than that I want a bribe. I want free stuff. I want your margins zero. Or why are you wasting my precious time? Seriously I will interact with McDonald’s when I am hungry and I chose McDonald’s. Or maybe I am undecided. Then I will place several choices in play and want bidding. Who will drop their pants the fastest wins. Is Fallon going to help a Brand drop their pants for me to win my business?

But seriously. Most of Digital Advertising so far has been wasted. With some exceptions. SEO is a success. Google Paid Search pretty good since its pay for performance. Shopping comparisons on Google, Bing where I can compare prices for things I already want are great for the consumer and margin destroyers for the sellers. Yes have a Social strategy even if your not in Social since viral attacks can occur and you should respond. And if your not ‘listening’ to learn your not a market leader in your segment.

But 98 Slides? Just read this blog post! Done.

About chiefalien

Howie Goldfarb with 20 years of Sales and Marketing experience founded Blue Star Strategic Marketing in central Vermont to serve as the objective and strategic adviser of brands to help them grow and thrive. His Degree in Finance and 14 years of B2B sales to Fortune 500 companies gives him a CFO’s view of marketing. Thus bringing a dose of reality to the confusing world of jargon, spin, and hype. Also playfully known as the Chief Alien of Blue Star Strategic, Howie relishes his role as an industry outsider. A native New Yorker and former Angelino, he currently lives in the Green Mountains of Vermont and is still seeking his first moose sighting. His passions are living life, art, music, the outdoors, he tries to cook and loves the Vermont Fresh Network – local sustainability initiatives like farm to table and buying local.
This entry was posted in advertising, agencies, brands, digital, hogwash. Bookmark the permalink.

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